Krayon's audio Reviews on Newgrounds

[Tremolo Mar]

Guitar!!!

Guitars!!! Wooohooo!!!! Someone finally did a classical guitar piece!! Mind, the only reason I haven't is because I don't have a guitar I can plug into my computer =). Very good song though there were a few areas that could do with improvement.
You've done an excellent job of implementing each of the different guitars in but you haven't managed to get the real feeling behind it. This song isn't particularly sad to be honest. You need more crescendo's and dynamics in this song. For example, the part at 0:08 that backs up the starting song needs a more difinite crescendo, make it louder and then fade away, louder, fade away, and so forth, also make it flow a bit more. Well used hammer ons and hammer offs can really effect how a song flows, from turning a generic up down strum stroke to a irish dancing tune to and sad lament. =) I've had a lot of practice in that area since I can never be bothered to actually learn a new song.
Personally I don't think it's possible to really capture a guitar electronically, just as chorals are nearly impossible due to the fact that theres so much you can carry in a song just through the way you pluck and strum, upstrokes are different from downstrokes, using your thumb to pick instead of the index and middle fingers and using different picking techniques can all effect the sound of a guitar.
Well, it's great to see that someone's finally done a guitar song, and done it well! Looking forward to hearing more of the same =).

[Battle of Mount Meggido]

hmmmm

I'll ignore the dodgy attempt at a biblical representation or the use of biblical themes and go straight to the song.
For a battle of gods and demons, especially armaggedon you need a lot more in a song then this to really capture epic. You had a decent idea, but it fell flat because of the following reasons:
You probably busted the decibel range on your program so the drums sound supressed and they cause the song to fall flat.
How many violins did you use? Too few anyway, for epic you need HUNDREDS of instruments, or heavy control of the instruments, that means lots of articulation, crescendo and the like. You really need to pull out the feeling behind something, and that often takes more skill then most people give credit for.
Choirs are an excellent idea but you really need a lot more bass then what you had, something ground shaking, rumbing, thundering in our ears. That especially goes for the drums, make them thunder, those ones sounded like cheap twenty dollar drums amplified a whole load of times.
You need more instruments and more control over each instrument section, ie weave them in and out of each other, epic is complex, thus the epic songs also need to be complex. This one's far too simple.
Some of those instruments were mildly annoying with the length they went on for in a sustained note, I'm not sure it's possible to make a violin sound on one note for 30 seconds and it sounded jarringly unrealistic, it really grated on my nerves.
I couldn't pick out the Gabriel section, there wasn't nearly enough contrast or feeling or the sense of loss as a being of unimaginable power is struck down.
The choirs need to be less sustained, use more stacato, shorter notes, hum haaa, hum hum haaaa, sort of thing not haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa onwards to infinity, and punctuate the notes with drums and short bursts of violins, chellos and other strings.
You don't have any brass! Where's the brass?!! Where are the brazen trumpets?!! The earthquake trombones?!! The horns? The Saxaphones? You can't do an epic piece like this without some sort of bass brass in there.
And finally, you need to work on the intruments, they sounded tinny and unrealistic, you should look for some proper instrument packs.

LacrimosaMuse responds:

i should have kinda explained the process behind the piece to avoid bad scores for no reason, i had to copy it onto Sonar using drag and drop, this explains why the choir can only do voice ahhhs, the violins sound like vibraphones, and the timpani are just snare drums EQd down alot. Needless to say, crescendos and sticattos, and overall complex dynamics were out of the question. the decibal ranges and the chimes/timps were created after the song was finalized on east and west. with that aside, however, thank you for your review, ive been working on rewriting the song on a different program to use more brass and keep the timps on a decent sound, ill let u know when that comes up
(btw, saxes are woodwinds lol)

[Chrysanthemum]

Nice start.

This song is actually quite decent for a first time and rushed... was it a first? Either way it was good, although a little repetitive it wasn't annoyingly so. You certainly have some nice variation and contrast there. I really like the fact that you manage to pull out all those instruments like that and use them properly. What program did you use? I hope you get better because this is a very good base to start from.
The only issues I had was the fact that it was so anticlimatactic and there are a few muddled bits where you have a lot of bass or lower instruments and they got a bit muffled, try to make sure that all your instruments are clear and clean.
There is certainly a lot of anticlimax eg you have an excellent build up to 0:46 then after that it just... sort of drops it, the build up was perfect! And then you do that wave like effect, unless you really want that I suggest that you put that sort of wave effect into a larger epic piece based on a panning view in an epic film, not this sort of piece, instead, carry the build up to an even louder crescendo, bring in the violins weaving in and out as the brass sour then pull it all down at the peak to a quieter section. Kinda like the 3:20 section that 3:50 ish section has a really nice violin and flute solo, listen to some of the Morrowind exploration and battle songs along with some of the best music mods this (http://au.gamespot.com/pc/rpg/elders crolls3morrowind/download_6094606.htm l) was my favourite with some great music, listen and see if you can learn from them.
Otherwise great job, as to repetitiveness, this song isn't too repetitive, it has some excellent variation which balances anything of that like. Very nicely done indeed.

[Heartbeat by Ereez]

Good, very good.

This didn't affect me a great amount, but nevetheless I can hear the feeling behing it. Good job.
A few tips, that guitar could be built on, it would add quite a bit to the song. You could add a few extra instruments in the background. You lost a point from lack of clarity with the guitar and for being a bit repetitive.

Ereez responds:

Thank you, for the compliment and tips.

[Dragon's Final Battle]

Good but...

As far as classical goes this one's alright. But there are plenty of places where it could improve. I had to deduct marks for clarity, origianity, lack of variation and poor use of classical instruments. I say that because you could have used way more instruments in this, also, the ones you have are either muffled, or don't sound like their originals, sorry but this sounds quite a lot like the electronic/techno version of RaustBlackDragon's "Dragon's final war".
The general instruments are muddy and... are those trumpets? While being a good idea, need more melody backing.
Otherwise it passes.

DJAirWave responds:

Electronic version of Dragon's final Roar? In my humble opinion, I think it sounds more realistic than the original. I don't think there is any problem with my song. The melody is just fine, and the clarity is proficient. Sorry, I have to disagree with you, but thanks anyway.

[When Gods Do Battle (full)]

Wellll

It's alright, but for something as epic as gods battling it falls way way short.
Quality of the instruments leaves a lot to be said, the general theme was alright but it was a bit too repetitive. Too quiet too.
Advice, have you ever heard even ten brass together? In harmony? It's incredible, now put that up to about 300... Use them in the begginning, longer notes with plenty of volume increase, which for the life of me I can't remember the technical term for.
Those trumpets need way more work, clear them out, they sound like they have rags stuffed in them. More articulation. Pup, pupup pup paaaaah, not wip ruprup raaah.
Definitely needs a major overhaul on drums, stronger, louder, more of them. Deeper ones too, some big tampani on the Dom Dom Dom and smaller ones in the background on a fast beat. Then a medium range set for the middle range complexity.
Whatever that electric section was... It was the only part of the song that came closish to epic battle, but it's too different. Knock it out, use the ideas I suggested before.
That quiet bit at 1:44 and after, knock it out. It doesn't belong in an epic battle. All of it, basically, after 1:44 the song becomes irrelevant.
If you want the electric part you need to tone it down and meld it into the whole song, listen to any Nightwish, Kamelot or Within Temptation song for ideas, in fact listen to Gaia Destruction from Nightwish, there's a collab on that here somewhere.
Basically you need to get more instruments in, clear out the ones that are there and use more longer instrumentation. Pull out those notes with a thundering drum track!

masterjiji responds:

i had it that quiet because GarageBand is only so good of a program, and with the guitar section at the end, the overall volume would have spiked to the point of ridiculous distortion.
getting louder is called a crescendo.
in respect to the trumpets, that was the only sound provided by GarageBand, and the sound fx i had to work with (distortion, amp sim, phaser, etc) were NOT going to help.
my idea of the song is this: think of a duel between (sorry to stereotype) Goku and Frieza from dbz. in the first sections with the horns, they pretty much just fight. at the f horn section feature, Frieza nails the hell out of Goku and therefore thinks he has won. at the part with the harp, Goku gets back up with the "you're goin' down, motherf**ker" look on his face, and pulps Frieza during the metal section. this actually works even better with the final version of this song i have posted.

the longest review i have ever gotten. for all the helpful criticism you gave, i was kinda hoping for more than... a 4.

[Story Left Untold (DJKarm]

Nice.

Nice, this reminds me a lot of the Oblivion Soundtrack and a soundtrack mod I downloaded for it. Especially the piano sound. Very good. Although it'd be nice if you could layer on several piano's at once in a piece, as well as add extra instruments.

[Frivolous Scrolls Battle Theme]

Hummmm

It's alright, as far as battle music goes I suggest you try a different medium, piano and normal drum kit just doesn't carry it. Some people can, this didn't quite work. Sorry. Reasons:
Notes weren't nearly smooth enough, nsaty pause at 0:07, and the second piano wasn't smooth, it was too choppy, the pauses too distinct. There isn't enough blending.
That backing paino needs way more work, it's slightly annoying with all those high notes, it clashes too much, now I know about disharmony, increasing by an octave etc but that didn't really work. It breaks up the flow.
If you want to do 3 different pianoes, the idea is to get them to either flow together and complement each other, or you do the much harder thing and have them playing in 3 different timesets and weave.
There was a decided lack of feel. Not enough depth or scope, also the variation was very limited.
THe drums are way too quiet and merely hold a backing place that doesn't really complement the piano, increase their volume and get a better beat, that one is far too generic.
The solo at 0:50 needs way more work, it jarrs and doesn't carry the song very well.
Lastly you need a more defined melody, this one sounds like a perpetual solo.

PianoFortress responds:

"I suggest you try a different medium, piano and normal drum kit just doesn't carry it." -The request was that I do it piano only, so I actually wasn't able to "choose" at all.

"Notes weren't nearly smooth enough, nsaty pause at 0:07" -can't hear a pause there.

"and the second piano wasn't smooth, it was too choppy, the pauses too distinct." - I agree, the last part from 1:39 has some bad timing but no the whole song.

"That backing paino needs way more work, it's slightly annoying with all those high notes, it clashes too much" -yeah, I know ppl who would agree there but I also know ppl who aren't annoyed by high notes. Guess it's different taste.

"If you want to do 3 different pianoes, the idea is to get them to either flow together and complement each other" -hmm..that was my intention.

"Not enough depth or scope, also the variation was very limited." -ok, let's see what we've got: 0:00-0:41 intro, 0:42-1:00 building climax, 1:01-1:18 bridge/kind of solo, 1:19-1:38 another climax, 1:39-1:57 bridge 2, 1:58-end outro. I'm happy with the variation of the song. don't know what I should change there, frankly.

"THe drums are way too quiet and merely hold a backing place that doesn't really complement the piano, increase their volume and get a better beat, that one is far too generic."- no, drums are fine as there are. if I make them louder it would put the piano into the background. Yeah, the beat could need some work. I'm not good at putting drumpatterns together =(. So, this time I've went with a basic beat.

"The solo at 0:50 needs way more work, it jarrs and doesn't carry the song very well." -well...zero123 for example liked it very much.

"Lastly you need a more defined melody, this one sounds like a perpetual solo."- I'll keep that in mind when I do another 2 or 3 piano song.

Well...that's it. Thanks for the constructive criticism.

[Defeat II]

Excellent.

This is an excellent atmospheric piece. I downloaded it, and that says a lot in itself. I very rarely download songs now unless I find a really good one. Excellent blending. Great vocals. I love it when people use real vocals in a classical piece. They just add so much to it. Great stuff so far, I'm looking forward to hearing more of your music.

[K&K - Betrayal]

Beautiful.

This song is incredibly beautiful. I haven't actually really reviewed any of your songs before if I remember correctly but I have listened to your music for years. Much of it has given me inspiration in the book I'm writing. You have an incredible ability to create music that often cuts straight to the heart of the matter without all the extra frivolities that many artists try to put into their music. That is something I admire and respect, simply because sometimes it can be the hardest way of doing things and secondly because music should not be cluttered by pointless frappery.
Personally, I think this song could really be extended a bit with a continuation of the new melody structure in 1:28. I;ve heard quite a few of your songs with Lindsay Ann, she has an amazing voice and many of your pieces really capture it. The human voice is a powerful thing, it is often the most powerful of instruments because it can capture feeling and move people in way that no other instrument can. Perhaps you could bring her in on the vocals for this one. It would go really nicely with your K & K project, which I have been following for some time, and have noticed no changes on the site. Is it finished or has it been postponed?
Oh yeah, and do you mind if I use K&K - Dragons in an animated short I'm preparing? It will be animated straight to the piece so I'm hoping to use the music to really convey the actions in the battle scene.